In Loving Memory of Mom...: 02/01/2008 - 03/01/2008

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

I wonder...

I think about my Mom every single day. I wonder if other's do. I wonder what she would think about a situation, I wonder what she would say, I wonder how she would have reacted, I wonder what her facial expression would be...I just wonder. Sometimes the wonder turns to tears and sometimes it brings a smile to my face...but I still wonder...

~Christine

Friday, February 22, 2008

Did Nana make it snow...

Today is Gavin's 2nd Birthday...can't believe he is two already. Gavin has wanted snow so bad and what little we have gotten wasn't worth playing in. Well today, on his birthday he go it. Lots and lots of snow....good snow, the kind you can play in and that's just what he did, for two hours. Sandi said to Gavin I think Nana made it snow for you...Gavin replied "see her". Oh how I wish he could see Nana. I know that Nana is watching him and loving that he got to play in the snow. I know that she will be right by his side tomorrow at his birthday party and I know that Nana made it snow for him...So, Yes Gavin, Nana did make it snow for you on your very special day. Happy 2nd Birthday Gavin!

~Christine

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Smiling down...

So, the other day while watching Mia I became so sad. Sad that my Mom is not here to see Mia laughing, talking, running...Sad, that Mom is not here to go to Gavin's second birthday party. Sad that she can't hear him talking and listen to how so very smart he is. Then John reminds me that she is here...watching us from above laughing and smiling down.

~Christine

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy Valentine's Day...

Every Valentine's Day for as long as I can remember I ALWAYS bought my Mom a box of Chocolates. Even before I could drive I would gather whatever money I had, hop on my bike and ride up to the 5 & 10 in hopes of being able to buy the biggest box of chocolates I could get... A tradition that went on until this year. Last year before John & I went away to Atlantic City for the night I made sure to get her a box of Chocolates and left them for her. I never in my wildest dreams imagined that that would be the last box I would buy her.

Back years ago Mom would also buy us little gifts. One year I got a bunch of smelly stickers...I was into collecting stickers...think I was in 6th grade, but probably younger. I can remember her making a heart shaped cake and the time she got my younger brothers, Bobby & Steven Valentine's day boxers.

Well, Happy Valentine's Day Mom...Do they have chocolate in heaven...I'm sure they do :)

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Eight months of missing you...

“You can shed tears that she is gone,
or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she'll come back,
or you can open your eyes and see all she's left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see her,
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her only that she is gone,
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what she'd want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.”
~~~~~~~~~
Missing you more and more each day.
~Christine

Friday, February 8, 2008

Do you remember, like I do...

As I got home today it hit me what today was 8 months ago...Today mirrors the days before Mom died 8 months ago, this Sunday. I can tell you what we ate for dinner (fish) that last friday night, I can tell you what we talked about, how bad she was feeling that day, how she cried because she could not get food to stay down, how I almost called the doctor because this was so riduculous, how we prepared for our father's day picnic, the very next day. This is the first time the the days of fallen just as they did 8 months ago. I am having a REALLY hard time with this. Did anyone else put this together like I have...do they remember???

~Christine

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

I cry...


I cry in silence so as not to upset.
I cry in silence so no one see's I've whept.
I cry in silence almost evey day.
I cry in silence...

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

A song for today...

As I Lay Me Down
Sophie B. Hawkins
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It felt like spring time, on this February morning
In the courtyard birds were singing your praise
I'm still recalling things you said to make me feel, Alright
I carried them with me today now
As I lay me down to sleep
This I pray
That you will hold me dear
Though I'm far away
I'll whisper your name
Into the sky
And I will wake up happy
I wonder why
I feel so high though I am not above the sorrow
Heavy hearted 'till you call my name
And it sounds like church bells or the whistle of a train
On a summer evening I'll run to meet you barefoot
Barely breathing
As I lay me down to sleep
This I pray
That you will hold me dear
Though I'm far away
I'll whisper your name
Into the sky
And I will wake up happy (oh darling)
As I lay me down to sleep
This I pray
That you will hold me dear
Though I'm far away
I'll whisper your name
Into the sky
And I will wake up happy
It's not too near for me
Like a flower I need the rain
Though it's not clear to me
Every season has its change
And I will see you
When the sun comes out again
As I lay me down to sleep
This I pray
That you will hold me dear
Though I'm far away
I'll whisper your name
Into the sky
And I will wake up happy (oh oh... )
As I lay me down to sleep
This I pray
That you will hold me dear
Though I'm far away
I'll whisper your name
Into the sky
And I will wake up happy
I wonder why(hmmm)
When the sun comes out again
When the sun comes out again
When the sun comes out again
When the sun comes out again (oooh)
When the sun comes out again
When the sun comes out again (hmmm)(comes out comes out oooh)
And I will wake up happy
So I pray

Nana and her babies...

Nana and her babies...
Gavin, Matthew & Mia with Nana taken Easter Morning 2007