It's still so hard...

It's Sunday which means I try to clean things that I can't get to during the week...closets, bathroom floor grout, etc. and it's so hard when I find stuff of Mom's. Just today I saw her wedding bouquet and her cookbook with her writing in it. It's hard and it sucks, really sucks.

These last couple of days I have really felt down. It could be cause it's been raining for days now but that's not it. I really miss Mom. I feel so bad that she didn't get to experience having normal hours with James. He used to work nights which meant he had to go to sleep early. Just before she died he got his hours changed to days. They never really got to enjoy this time. I really feel bad for both of them.

I asked John yesterday if we could have her back for just one more day. One day to just have fun together doing whatever she wanted. Of course he said that wasn't possible and then he said and what if you did get that chance, could you really ever let her go, again?

Sorry this post was a downer...just having a hard day. Enjoy your day and remember to give your loved ones an extra kiss and hold them just a little bit longer.

~Christine